I balance being and doing

THE QUEST FOR PAID WORK (Making a living Campaign)


PASSION. The work that I do must be something that I enjoy doing. Usualy, I love my work so much that I do not even feel like it is work.

CONTRIBUTE. In recent years, ever since I became a mom, my life has changed tremendously. I underwent a radical transformation, step by step. I was a chrysalis for 2-3 years, and I turned into a butterfly. People who knew me once no longer recognize me. I really changed a lot (inside), which means that the kind of work I would like to have also has changed. Contribute to society is now a big indispensable component of my life.

POSITIVE MINDS. People around me are very important. After my divorce, I made considerable efforts to end all toxic relationships in my life. Negative people deplete energy. I promised myself not to allow the creation of negativity in my environment. Therefore, I look for people with positive attitudes, positive minds.

INTEGRITY.  “There can be no enthusiasm in anything that you are promoting, projecting, planning, or striving toward unless it has total intergrity.” (Robert H. Schuller, The Peak to Peek Principle) It makes no sense for me to promote transparency and collaboration, if there is a lack of integrity. I prefer environments where people are guided by core values: compassion, love, loyalty, honesty, integrity.

GOOD LISTENING. I find that there can be not real collaboration if listening isn’t there: people showing empathy, understanding the context of the other person and listening from all levels (body, mind, heart, and soul). This means look and listen to situations, but also look and listen inside.

EMOTIONALLY CLOSENESS. “Empathy, the capacity to feel with another in his suffering, is born first of awareness, then of sympathetic connection.” (Daphne Rose Kingma, The Men We Never Knew) I look for shared enthusiasm, genuine caring for others, willingness to build a relationship, reinforcing the strenghts of others, increasing self-esteem of others.

CREATIVITY. I must admire what the group stands for. The rules are loose enough for me to breathe. I am appreciated. There is minimal pressure to conform. Things are not too organized. People are having fun around me. New ideas excite those in charge. New ideas move up the ladder quickly. I am allowed to be independant in choosing assignments.


I AM PASSION. I don’t let the train of life pass by me. I mean to board it… and I want to contribute to make a better world. With passion, obstacles, challenges and adversities only make the journey more exciting and accomplishments become even more thrilling. Passion helps me search for the deeper meaning in everything I do. I learn from sorrows: I don’t get roasted in suffering. I learned to develop awareness of the pain, track it down to the learning hidden in its roots, and persevere to take appropriate action to leap out of it. Kundalini has been a real blessing for me, because no-thing seems to affect me anymore: I found a way to conserve passion.

I DESERVE IT. I believe that this universe has only one purpose: to plant desires in our mind and help us to fulfill them. My dreams are good dreams. I deserve to see them fulfilled. I tell myself that I deserve to be given whatever I ask for! I want to believe…

I BALANCE BEING & DOING. They constitute an inseparable whole for me. I like being a lot, but I am attracted to people who like doing a lot (like John F Moore, for instance, we have complementary skills). The more I am with my being, the more clarity I get about what I am. The more clarity I develop, the more conviction I grow about why I am here, and what I ought to be doing with my life. On a scale of one to ten, I give this a 10.

I AIM HIGH. So many people tell me to aim low. It bothers me. I would like to undertake only jobs/projects that are high-scoring and highly meaningful. I think big!


Uh. So depressing to answer… The list is way too long. When is it gonna end? How will it ever go away?

Risk aversion, locking processes, fear of the unknown, power-hungry leaders, excessive control, lack of awareness, design flaws that discourage public utilization and engagement, corruption and non-transparent rules, culture of silence, governments who see open government as a threat, legal constraints limiting the ability to create tools and services useful to the public, public distrust.

Lack of open government market, very little job opportunities in this field.

Unclear question?

Lyne, your report makes me think that the brief itself has been framed in an unclear way. I would be interested in the actual patterns of allocation of time and effort rather than the guiding principles. In an earlier mission and earlier interactions we had you told the story of how you tried to put together a Francophonie opengov project. That entailed a lot of hustling, proselitizing, banging on close doors. It also brought to a difficult decision, that of throwing in the towel and quitting. This is a superimportant question: knowing when to quit and when to persevere. I myself have not cracked that one.

It is more of these concrete activities I would like to see spelled out in “the quest for paid work”. I guess in your case you could say: in order to get to my objectives (not so different from yours), I invested a lot in networking and social media. I could say that I invested a lot in academic knowledge, reading and writing essays and books.

Were you misled by the brief? Or is it simply that you prefer to think in a more abstract, Paulo Coelho-like way?

Cloudy foggy

I was misled by the brief.

Also, one could say it like that, for the last two years, I tend to think more and more in a Paulo Coelho-like way. (I will explain further why this is happening, at the end of this comment.)

I want to know God’s thoughts; the rest are details.” (Albert Einstein) That pretty much sums what I would like to achieve. All my thoughts tend to this. An incredible force pushes me towards this.

Without really having understood it until recently, this has translated for me, in a concrete immediate way:  there is no need to talk. I suppose I associate talking with details (???).

I did not want to quit! J’ai jeté les armes, I surrendered, because I was against the wall. There was nothing else I could do. After receiving the answer: “There is no solution. There is nothing at our government that allows us to do this project.” What a mega extinguisher…

I did not quit because I no longer believe in this stuff, or because I lack endurance or persistance / perseverance, or because I chose other priorities.

As with prisoners, I had no other alternative but to escape with my mind. Two or three weeks after I ceased all activity and gave up, after I completely let go, I reached the 3rd (of 4) level of inner development.

In my quest for paid work, indeed, I invested a lot in networking, social media, reading and thinking (creation of knowledge). I didn’t go as far as writing a book. Hell, I’d like to have that drive (I may even make some money out of it) but all it tells me is to continue my race and not think about the details. I managed to explore really far. It’s really amazing. I thought these things only existed in books. I was convinced that one of the most ordinary person, like me, would never approach such heights. But it happened. And it’s not that difficult. One just really needs to understand what it means to be connected to all that exists. Euh… and perhaps a couple of other things.

This kind of quest for paid work led me (financially) to nothing. It led me to a big wall. An impregnable fortress. A fence higher than all the voices of citizens put together. Untouchable.

I tried a quest for paid work in a more conventional way. I find it rather horrible to contemplate the results: I cannot make it either way.

So what to do?

Do not panic. Do not panic. Do not panic. I repeat it to myself constantly. Trust your intuition.

For now, there is Edgeryders. The process helps me figure stuff about myself, like in a psychologist’s office. Beyond that, I have no idea what will happen to me. But I know I am EXPANDING.

Via Edgeryders, I realized that some of the things that I want to know – in an Albert Einstein way – I WANT TO KNOW GOVERNMENT OFFICIAL’S THOUGHTS.

Creation of knowledge is important for me. IT’S PART OF FILLING MY NEEDS. Exploring various models with others will probably help me filling this specific need.

By understanding what kind of thoughts correspond to the current leadership model, and having explored another kind of way of thinking, I could use this knowledge to help leaders make the transition: by helping them to become aware of their patterns and models, is it possible to guide some to change?  (???)  #JustSaying.

What to do? What to do? What to do? I have questions, no satisfactory answer yet.

Meanwhile, something inside my body is changing, I am in a process of a deep physically transformation. When I sneeze, my fontanelle, the top of my head, really hurts. Houlà, something very weird is happening to the top of my head! I cannot ignore this. It’s an important part of my development. I would like to be able to combine it to my making a living quest.

I read this article yesterday by Deepak Chopra, “Did you know that your brain actually shrinks when you have Depression?” It really hit me. http://www.deepakchopra.com/blog/view/5/depression:_shedding_light_on_the_darkness  I do not care a bit about the details… This article had a reverse effect on me: it made me think about  what happens at the other end of the spectrum. What happens when someone is ultra happy? When someone is in a state of euphoria?

Everyday —  there is not a day that it does not happen  —, I feel that my head overflows. I have the sensation that my head grows and it pushes on the fontanelle. I suppose this makes me think more and more in a Paulo Coelho-like way. Ref : 10 signs of a spiritual awakening http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=txTsbeuY5gM&feature=related . Sign #2:Shivers, crawling sensations, tingles on your scalp. Feeling pressure on the crown. Flashes of great inspiration / creativity / thoughts. Feeling vibration around the head and ears.”

If it happened to me, it can happen to everyone else…

Now, how can I use this to help others (and hey, me too!)?

Here’s a more detailed explanation. This stuff is real, it is a physical experience.

The human BODY has to undergo a HUGE TRANSFORMATION in order to support higher states of consciousness.

Only the spirit has the necessary energy intelligence and operational software to use the full capacity of the human mind. This transformation  can lead to utilisation of the unknown 90% capacity of the brain. A spirit filled human mind will create harmony, unity, cooperation, understanding and will become a transformational votex, a channel through which universal awareness can flow into this physical world.

The evolution through which the embodied self becomes aware of its true immortal state involves a TRANSMUTATION of the whole personality in its subconscious as well as conscious aspects. This requires a complete overhaul and restructuring of the human machine (reengineering of the human DNA) to make it fit to become the residence of a higher intelligence, of an order greater than that which lies in a normal human body.

In the human body exists an extremely subtle and complex mechanism located in the SEXUAL ORGANS. This mechanism, when it is initiated and brought to a quick activity, reacts strongly on the body, and performs in a given period of time, a wonderful transformation of the nervous system and brain, resulting in the manifestation of a higher type of consciousness, to become the common heritage of Man in the distant future. (This mechanism is known as Kundalini.)

During its rise from the seat at the base of the spine to the crown of the head, Kundalini energy sprinkles “nectar” (or very intense vibrations) to the six chakras (lotus) which bloom in six important junctions of nerves along the central nervous system, and governs the transmutation of sensory and vital organs. These chakras (lotus) bloom one after the other at the approach of the stream of energy, until the stream reaches the thousand-petalled lotus at the top of the head (called the crowned chakra), where it is absorbed in an ecstatic union with the collective consciousness. Released from the chains that bind a human to the earth, the embodied consciousness soars to the heights of sublime self-realization, awake for the first time after eons of enslavement of its own ineffable and immortal nature (in other words, a human being can tap into immortality and eternity before the time of death).

One feels distinctly an incomparable feeling of happiness running through all the nerves, moving from the fingertips, toes, and other parts of the trunk and limbs to the spine, which, concentrated and intensified, rises up with a growing intensity of delight, and eventually floods the upper region of the brain with an ecstatic and life-giving stream of rare vibratory sensation and radiating light.

Kundalini, as the supreme master of the body energy, it alone is being considered capable of giving to those who devote all their thoughts and all their actions, abandon themselves entirely to its will. Kundalini as the architect. It has the power to shape the human body, to transform or even destroy the body as it pleases. But how this energy manages to accomplish all this, in ways comparable with the biological laws that govern the organic world, no one has tried to clarify it in explicit terms yet.

It takes several years after the first awakening sensations – the Kundalini process of transmutation in all cells and organs takes some time -, before the appearance of mental parapsychic powers (miraculous) associated with the Enlightenment (described by Ancients).